Mariska Hargitay Didn’t Grieve Her Mother’s Passing Until Her Mid-20s

Regulation & Order star Mariska Hargitay misplaced her mom Jayne Mansfield in a automotive accident when she was simply three-years-old. But it surely wasn’t till a lot afterward in life that she began really processing her grief.

How Mariska Hargitay realized she was grieving her mom at a later age

Mariska Hargitay | Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic

It took a while for Hargitay to discover ways to correctly take care of the lack of her mom. It wasn’t an in a single day course of, and required trial and error for the actor to deal with her emotions.

“The way I’ve lived with loss is to lean into it,” Hargitay as soon as instructed People. “As the saying goes, the only way out is through. In my life, certainly I’ve tried to avoid pain, loss, feeling things. But I’ve learned instead to real­ly lean into it, because sooner or later you have to pay the piper.”

Hargitay would ultimately flip to remedy for assist, which helped her deal with her loss in a wholesome manner.

“I think it saved my life,” Hargitay instructed CBS News about remedy. “Trauma freezes us. And I think people don’t fully understand how powerful it is.”

What would possibly’ve been a little bit of a shock, was that Hargitay realized she hadn’t moved previous her mom’s dying the way in which she thought.

“I started to grieve my mother’s passing in my mid-20s, like it had happened yesterday. And I went, ‘Oh, okay, so this is still in there.’ And then as I got in therapy, I just kept getting stronger and investing in myself in a new way,” she mentioned.

These days, nonetheless, she’s in a significantly better place, reaping the rewards of her remedy and a newfound readability.

“I’m not saying it’s easy, and it certainly hasn’t been for me,” she mentioned. “There’s been a lot of darkness. But on the other side things can be so bright.”

Mariska Hargitay used to search out her mom’s identify to be a burden

Hargitay’s mom, Jayne Mansfield, was a preferred actor herself within the Fifties and 60s. Hargitay would go on to observe in her late mom’s footsteps. However initially, being the daughter of a star like Mansfield offered extra challenges for the actor, who needed to make a reputation for herself.

“In some ways, being the daughter of a Hollywood icon has been a burden. I used to hate constant references to my mom because I wanted to be known for myself. Losing my mother at such a young age is the scar of my soul,” Hargitay as soon as instructed Closer.

What made Hargitay really feel nearer to her mother wasn’t her appearing profession, nonetheless. It was motherhood. Hargitay at present shares three youngsters with husband Peter Hermann, which she felt helped her establish with Mansfield extra.

 “Being a wife and mother is my life, and that gives me the most joy. I understand [my mother] in a new way that gives me peace. Now I understand the love she had in her, and it makes me feel closer to her,” Hargitay mentioned.

Though she spent little time with Mansfield, Hargitay acquired to know her mom extra over time. The SVU star was proud to study there was extra to Mansfield than simply being an actor.

“My mother was this amazing, beautiful, glamor­ous sex symbol — but people didn’t know that she played the violin and had a 160 IQ and had five kids and loved dogs,” she mentioned. “She was just so ahead of her time. She was an inspiration, she had this appetite for life, and I think I share that with her.”

She additionally as soon as acquired some very encouraging phrases that additional helped her bond along with her mom.

“Someone once said about [remembering] my mother: ‘All you have to do is look in the mirror,’ ” she recalled. “She’s with me still.”

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